Hello! My name is Addie Ghoul and what you are about to witness is me losing weight. I don't hate myself, my weight has NEVER stopped me from living my life, and there will be NO thinspo. I'm a college graduate, live with my mom and my amazing boyfriend. I will post my progress, recipes, and personal posts.
Everyone has rolls when they bend over. Everyone. Lets just get this out of the way right off the bat. In the last few months, I’ve had over 30 women ranging from rail thin to extra large naked in my bed and I would routinely ask them to hug their knees. You won’t believe this… ALL OF THEM HAD TUMMY ROLLS. Not one was exempt. Even my super fabulous professional model 6 foot tall and some amazing Katie had rolls. The stomach pictures turned into some of my favorite images from the project… so quit thinking they’re bad, and try accepting (dare I say embracing?) yours!
When people say “you’re gorgeous”, believe them. I tend not to, and it’s a cryin’ shame. When people genuinely compliment you, it’s because they really see it. Try to not dismiss their perspective as wrong and assume that you know better. They see all of you. We see our flaws. Believe them.
“Arm flab is embarrassing.” No its not, go fuck yourself. No, not you. The people who tell us that, silly.
You’re not stunning despite your body. You’re stunning because of your body. There is a distinct difference. I grew up in a culture that would deem “unattractive” women as “special spirits”. A degrading categorization that implied that the only thing worthwhile was whatever was inside. Well, yeah. We are all much much more than our bodies, but our bodies are a beautiful part of us too. Beauty comes from the inside AND the outside. I am of the firm belief that every person is beautiful, and so this leaves the inside to be the part that is the most telling when it comes to true “beauty”.
A guy can pick you up off your feet, and it won’t break his back. “Wait, whaaaaaa Jes? You’re full of shit.” Nope. This just happened to me for the first time in… six years? I’m considerably heavier than I was 6 years ago (like… 70 pounds heavier) and so when I ran up to my friend Eric for a hug and he picked me up with my heels in the air… it left me breathless. I had forgotten that it was possible; I had accepted a life void of being lifted. So exhilarating. Eric didn’t suffer any injuries and walked away unscathed.
You don’t need to exercise every day in order to feel better about yourself. Many believe that someone who’s fat needs to exercise as much as possible in order to prove that they’re committed to becoming “less fat”. As if accepting one’s body as is would be a sin, and that’s just silly. Yes, exercising has wonderful physical and mental benefits, but you don’t owe it to anyone else to make an effort to change your body unless you wanna. You do not have to alter yourself to be okay. Period.
You’re allowed to fall in love with yourself. I promise. This will be the scariest thing you will ever do, and that’s okay. It will also be the most amazing (albeit super gradual) experience you will ever have. It doesn’t make you narcissistic. It doesn’t make you vain. It is liberating in every form of the word.
It’s also okay to have days where you don’t love yourself. Read this. No really. Read it. And then realize that we’ve grown up learning and internalizing that we are not okay our entire life. For me, that’s 26 years of self-hate indoctrination and brainwashing. It’s going to take a lot longer than you think to reverse this thinking, and it’s definitely not going to happen overnight. Allow yourself to have “weak” days. Cry, mourn, sob, yell, throw things. Whichever. Then get up, brush yourself off, give the media the finger, and move forward because you’re a warrior.
Everyone’s boobs are uneven. If you have a lot of boobs, they might be way uneven. Don’t stress. This is totally normal.
There are people who prefer large ladies. And I mean all sizes of large. I thought that my best bet in life was to find a partner who accepted my fat. Pause. Give me a minute to hang my head and shake it at myself. Not only are there people who adore “thick” women, but a LOT of them who prefer it. This eventually ends up in an interesting territory which Marianne talks about here, but the point that I’m trying to make goes back to the “despite vs because of” argument. Here is what you need to know: you do NOT need to settle for a lover who is “okay” with your body. You have the right (and millions of opportunities) to find someone who is infatuated with your body. You deserve to be worshiped, woman!
Fat chicks bang hot guys… ALL. THE. TIME.I know that hot is relative and all inclusive depending on who you chat with, but for these purposes, lets talk about the “universally attractive” kind of hot. Y’know, the kind fat chicks don’t deserve? We want to pretend that we don’t know what I’m talking about, but lets be real; we totally do. The fact that “fat chicks bang ‘hot’ guys” was one of the most powerful realizations I’ve had thus far. In line with the above paragraph, I knew that there would be someone that would find me attractive but the pool would be small (because of my body) and potentially full of guys I didn’t personally find sexy. So I would have to settle for anyone that would take me. After all, how could a conventionally gorgeous man (tall and with tattoos of course) like fat chicks? Weh-he-hell, let me tell you somethin’: through various sites, events, parties, and corner store meetings, I found myself with over a hundred men who were champing at the bit to get with this. I was the one who had to sift through and pick the hottest of the hot. Ladies, over a hundred. “Girls” showed what society thinks about that when Hannah’s character has a weekend romance with an attractive and wealthy doctor. People flipped their shit. “Patrick Wilson is so hot he would never do Lena Dunham” was the most eye catching. Wilson’s wife responded to that rubbish here, but the tweet speaks volumes about what the majority of people think unconventional women deserve. Jesus christ, it’s annoying. I won’t spill the details of my bedroom coming and goings, but lets just say this: the hottest guys in Tucson and I get along just fine. I would recommend reading Emily’s article on xoJane for a better explanation of what I’m struggling to say. Know this: the myth that “atypical” bodies can’t be paired with “typically attractive” bodies is false. Women need to know that all bodies can be paired with all bodies.
Riding during sex will NOT collapse his insides. Just trust me on this one, what you fear is totally false. Here’s a great article that changed my life.
Wearing whatever you want is a political statement. Join the revolution. Throw style rules out the window. Wear the tutu. Wear the horizontal stripes. Wear the turquoise skinny jeans. Wear the see-through blouse. Wear the bikini. Wear the sweat pants. Wear the shirt that says “Does this shirt make me look fat?”. Wear whatever it is that makes you happy. This is your life.
You are fucking beautiful. I’m saying this with a straight face and seriously meaningful look where I maintain eye contact for an uncomfortable amount of time. I know you don’t feel like you fit into the category of gorgeous that our world creates. I know that its hard. I know that its a daily battle. But fuck their fascist beauty standards. The second you stop looking for a skinny model in your mirror and start looking at YOU… is the second you will start to appreciate what you are. Stop looking for flaws. Stop looking for differences. You are perfect. You are more than enough. You are the best thing that has ever happened to you. And you are fucking beautiful.
Say it with me.I’m actively sobbing.
(via stophatingyourbody)
I really miss losing weight and feeling good. I need some motivation. I need to set goals.
But I don’t know what goals to set. I can’t do anything like a vacation or a tattoo….not enough funds for that. I guess I can reward myself with clothing or makeup? A new purse?
What do you guys use for goals?
Spell something in my ask :D
A - If I’m in love.
B - Who the last person I talked to on the phone was.
C - How long it’s been since I’ve kissed.
D - If I have a preference for boys or girls.
E - How many holes I have in my ears.
F - Give me any options, like ‘hot or cold?’
G - The last person I said ‘I love you’ to.
H - The last person I hugged.
I - The last time I felt jealous, and why.
J - How old I am.
K- What my full name is.
L - If I have siblings.
M - If I forgive betrayal.
N - If you want to know how I treat my friends.
O - If I like my school.
P - What kind of music I like.
Q - What the last party I went to was, and when the next will be.
R - For me to tell 10 of my curiosities.
S - 2 habits.
T- 5 things I love unconditionally.
U - How many texts I send daily.
V - 3 big dreams.
W - An idol.
X - If I’ve done something I regret very much.
Y - If I like my town and why.
Z - Ask any question you want.
Boooored. Do it!
(via healthyforabetterfuture)
Reblog if you’d like 1 message from a curious anon.
(via healthyforabetterfuture)
Why is America so into rape scenes?
Why do TV shows get set up with someone being raped? Wtf…
Had an awesome dinner of salmon, spinach salad and carrots!
:)
Hopefully I can get my eating back on track.
What do you guys reward yourselves with???
I love when a fun day out with my mom turns into ‘Otis invites himself and his whole fucking family’ day….
This is the most unique one I've seen, please yes.
- 1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.
- 2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?
- 3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.
- 4) What do you think about most?
- 5) Ever had a poem or song written about you?
- 6) Do you have any strange phobias?
- 7) What's your religion?
- 8) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?
- 9) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?
- 10) What was the last lie you told?
- 11) Do you believe in karma?
- 12) What does your URL mean?
- 13) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?
- 14) Who is your celebrity crush?
- 15) How do you vent your anger?
- 16) Do you have a collection of anything?
- 17) Are you happy with the person you've become?
- 18) What's a sound you hate; sound you love?
- 19) What's your biggest "what if"?
- 20) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?
- 21) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.
- 22) Smell the air. What do you smell?
- 23) What's the worst place you have ever been to?
- 24) Most attractive singer/s of your opposite gender?
- 25) To you, what is the meaning of life?
- 26) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
- 27) What was the last movie you saw?
- 28) What's the worst injury you've ever had?
- 29) Do you have any obsessions right now?
- 30) Ever had a rumor spread about you?
- 31) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?
- 32) What is your astrological sign?
- 33) What's the last thing you purchased?
- 34) Love or lust?
- 35) In a relationship?
- 36) How many relationships have you had?
- 37) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?
- 38) Where is your best friend?
- 39) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?
- 40) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?
- 41) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?
- 42) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
- 43) What's a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?
- 44) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?
- 45) How can I win your heart?
- 46) Can insanity bring on more creativity?
- 47) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
- 48) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?
- 49) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word "heart."
- 50) Basic question; what's your favorite color/colors?
- 51) What is your current desktop picture?
- 52) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?
- 53) What would be a question you'd be afraid to tell the truth on?
- 54) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?
- 55) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
- 56) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
- 57) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?
- 58) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
- 59) Ever been on a plane?
- 60) Give me your top 5 hottest celebrities.
QUESTION!
So even if you stumble upon this and don’t know me, answer!
I can’t seem to find much about this any where online.
My boyfriend and I are moving into our first place in two weeks, and we have NO family where we are. Lots of his family are planning on sending us money/things. Is it tacky to create a registry at Target of things we need just to send them so we don’t get stuff we don’t like?
